The Beauty Denominator

I find it hilarious that men don’t consider when they talk about someone as gossiping, but when women do the same thing then we gossip. It’s the old double standard which cracks me up. I don’t deny that I like to hear the latest gossip or get the scoop about what is going on around me, but I never believe half of what I read or hear because things certainly have a way of getting twisted around and even photos can be very misleading.

I have always tried to find a positive in everyone and not spread rumors or gossip and poor Bill every time he tells me something he always prefaces it with I’m not making fun of this person or that, but…and then he proceeds to tell his tale and he’s quite use to me trying to put a nice spin on something and telling him that there is usually more to something than meets the eye and you don’t know that for a fact and you shouldn’t repeat every thing your told or see.

That old saying of, sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me is simply not true. Words can be very hurtful and rumors and gossip especially the malicious catty kind can definitely ruin a reputation and life. Not everyone is strong even though they may appear to be and not everyone can continue to hold up their head when people are treating them unkindly. I have personally known people that actually died from shame of course it was self inflicted and it didn’t need to be.

Okay that’s enough on that somber note. Like I said I love to get the scoop and if it’s good news then I’m more than happy to pass it along if it’s true and since I never know if something is true unless I hear it straight from the person concerned it usually goes through one ear and out the other and my friends have always gotten mad at me when they wanted to talk about someone or the way they looked and I wouldn’t participate.

I decided I didn’t need friends like that because the minute you say something negative you can be sure that it will have a way of coming back to bite you eventually. So my motto has always been If I can’t say something nice about someone then I don’t say anything at all, usually, unless it’s a child molester then I’ll call them any foul thing I can think of just because to me that is the lowest of the low and they deserve no kindness or consideration.

There I go again I had to make it somber, okay on that note I’m putting ugly stuff out of my mind and just think beautiful thoughts the rest of the weekend. It must be the rainy weather it always pulls at your spirits a little, tomorrow is suppose to be nice so I’ll be outside, have a good one.

I wrote a post today and silly me didn’t back it up and when I pushed publish my server decided to blow up and I lost it. It was a pretty good post too, but I was so agitated that I refused to rewrite it. Instead I spent the evening with Bill and my son and daughter ( Shadow and Sadie, my dogs ).

I came back up to answer all those reciprocity comments that piled up while I was offline and for some reason that agitated me because I have many pages on this blog answering most of the questions and there are many comments that have asked the same things over and over.

I understand that people don’t want to sift through a bunch of back pages that’s why I put the sitemap above so the information could be found easier, but no one looks there first and the same question gets asked over and over. I do need to update that sitemap, but the reciprocity information is basically all there and one page tells you exactly what to do if you’re moving out of state.

Every state has it’s own rules, laws, and statutes and they change constantly. I even have a list of state board sites that people can visit to find any type of information they require and the most updated info for those states on those sites, but apparently no one looks over there on the far right side under LINKS. Okay I got that out of my system I think I’ll go to bed.

I apologize for all comments and questions that went unanswered over the past week. I took a much needed break from the online Internet world. I had many things to do at home that I have been neglecting for awhile and since Bill was away and I was alone this was the perfect time to do them.

I have been way too wrapped up in this virtual world and I did a lot of thinking about the way I have been spending my time for the past 2 years. I realize that I have lost all track of my friends because I have been totally happy with Bill, my pets, this computer, and my life, but without Bill in my life I would be one lonely person.

I realize that I am becoming a shut-in. I really don’t like to think of myself as antisocial, but I guess I am. I still blame everything on menopause right now because that’s a handy excuse for me to be alone and not depress other people. At any rate I’ll work it out and as soon as I get caught up with e-mail and a trillion other things that went unattended I will answer all comments.

I have known several people that has undergone breast augmentation and when I was young I even considered it, but when it comes to surgery I’m a wimp. It’s rather common place now and women that have participated in post-operative surveys report that their quality of life has been enhanced.

They have more self confidence and self esteem seems to rocket because of their new enhanced appearance. Overall health is usually reported as better and their social and sexual functions improve dramatically. Most women report long term satisfaction with their breast implants even when they need revision-augmentation due to complications or aesthetic reasons.

There are also those that have breast reductions done for the same reasons. My niece had this process done several years ago and she told me that it was the best decision she has ever made. She no longer has back pain and she doesn’t feel self conscious with men staring at her breast all the time. I have never had that problem, but I’m sure I wouldn’t like it either.

Are we ever happy with our appearance? The answer to that is apparent since more and more people are going under the knife. I have no clue what goes through the mind of people to make them torture themselves with all the surgeries. I would be scared to death because of all the botched cosmetic surgeries that I have heard about.

Primary reconstruction surgery is used to replace breast tissue that was removed because of trauma, cancer or because it failed to develop properly and the breast is abnormal. I can understand surgery in these instances and the need that these patients might have and also when women have had children and would like to have a breast lift.

Studies have shown that there is a pattern among patients that opt for breast augmentation and many other cosmetic surgery procedures. I read awhile back that some women who choose breast implants are more likely to have undergone some sort of psychotherapy. The pattern shows they have lower self-esteem and a higher tendency toward suicide attempts and depression than the normal population.

I personally don’t know if all that is true because the women I have known seemed okay to me, but of course I’m not a doctor and you never really know what someone else is thinking. Most women have the implants done over and over, larger and larger and my mind simply doesn’t grasp the need for that much cosmetic surgery and pain.

My best friends daughter-in-law was a beautiful girl with small breasts and her husband talked her into breast augmentation. She started modeling and would compete in the bikini contest around town and she picked up a modeling contract and of course she or it might have been him were never satisfied with the results of the augmentations and they had to do bigger ones several times.

She started doing lingerie ads and some were pretty racy and they both lost their jobs. If it had been me I would have sued the company, but I think they had a morals clause. At any rate they wanted to move on to better things and he was her manager so they moved to Reno and used that as their base. She did work for Playboy and of course the husband wasn’t allowed at the parties or shoots.

I’m watching Idol and even though Simon thinks little David is ahead and I do agree with him because big David seems somehow not to have his heart in it and it’s too bad because I think Cook should win it. At 25 he would be better able to do something with his career and I think little David would be under the thumb of his Father and I don’t think that’s a good idea.

I have watched Idol since the 3rd season and have really enjoyed it. I have never voted for anyone, but I’m seriously thinking about casting a vote, but I don’t know if I will. I think it’s great that these kids have an opportunity to do something and regardless of who wins they will all be winners. Little David has many years to perfect and I think he needs to get out from under his Fathers influence before he gets the golden key.

As I get older I notice my eyes are getting dryer and more irritated and it doesn’t matter how many drops I put in to help, it’s just getting harder to wear my contacts, so I think a change is due. With working online they also get very tired and strained. I know I probably need to get a new prescription.

I have been using the Acuvue 2 by Johnson & Johnson as you can see by the photo below, but I am dying to try the Acuvue Oasys by the same company because they have been reported as having the hydraclear feature that would help my eyes stay more moist.

I found 1-800-GET-LENS online and they sell different major brands below cost, but I like Johnson & Johnson and from what they say the lens are tinted so you can find them in the solution, but they wont change your eye color.

I personally don’t wont to change my eye color, but the fashionable people have fun doing that. I just want my eyes to feel more comfortable. I really never thought I would be able to wear contacts so it was years before I even tried and of course you have to show them you can put them in and take them out before they let you leave.

When someone is watching me do anything I get nervous and do everything wrong and it was no exception with my first attempts at doing my contacts. It took me about 30 minutes and I got very frustrated. I finally had to take a deep breath and calm down and when I totally ignored the girl that was watching me I had no problem.

I started a feature last week where I decided to share blogs and posts that I like and that I think will be helpful for you and this week I decided to highlight Heidi of the Health Nut Wannabe Mom blog. This mom shares a lot of good information that I think you will enjoy reading.

Everyone is trying to live a healthier life so they can live longer and enjoy their families and careers. It has been reported that we are living a lot longer now so who wants to be decrepit at age 50 and not be able to enjoy a good quality of life? You will find many good health tips on this blog and her latest is about the health benefits you receive from having a pet.

I think it’s great how they take trained animals into nursing homes to help the sick and give the older patients something to look forward to. However not everyone is an animal lover and when Bob’s Mom was there they brought a beautiful dog by and asked if she wanted to pet him and she told them to get that dog out of her room. 

I think you’ll find a lot of useful information at Health Nut Wannabe Mom and you can pick up some skin care tips and find out why you should eat spicy food. I’ll be on the look out for next weeks feature blog or post and it might be you. I hope you find something useful you can use on this blog. I’m sure you’ll like it.

If you’ve ever been through a divorce or separation and you have children then one of your biggest concerns will be about how the divorce will affect your children. My son was 10 when I left my ex and he had a hard time with it. Children learn very quickly what pleases a parent and what annoys them and they are a lot smarter than we give them credit for.

Believe it or not many children learn very quickly how to manipulate their divorced parents. You might not believe it about your children, but it is a very common issue that occurs. Of course with my son it happened even before the divorce, he always tried to play the two of us off the other. He even tried to manipulate his teachers, they called me in for a conference and told me about things that he was up to.

Children of course want their own way just as we adults do and they often figure out how to manipulate very effectively. It’s not just the older children that do it though, you will see that the young ones are also quick studies, they just go about it in different ways. If you’re in the process of divorce you may give your children too much leeway. You really don’t want to do that very often.

A divorce is very traumatizing for all concerned and as parents we feel inadequate. That’s one of the reasons why children are able to successfully manipulate their parents. We don’t want to let our children down any more than we feel we already have. We also fear that our children won’t love us as much as the other parent if we don’t give in to their desires, but that’s not true. 

You have to understand the difference between what your children actually need and when they are attempting to get one over on you. Children sense that your vulnerable and your defenses are down after a divorce and use it to their benefit. If you find that this is going on you shouldn’t be too hard on them because they are also going through some big changes.

You do need to let them know you are disappointed and that they aren’t going to be allowed to continue doing it. It’s understandable why parents would fall for this though. After all, they don’t want their children to be traumatized by what has taken place. They want to see their children happy and thriving in their environment. Make sure you are consistent with the rules you have set for your children though.

Children are always going to test the limits. They may even tell you they want to go live with their other parent when you don’t give in to them, Eric did this quite often. This will hurt you and they know it, but you have to stand firm and tell them that you’re sorry they feel that way, but that you are sticking by your decision.

It would be nice if communication were still open with your ex then you could work out similar rules for both homes.

Children always have to be a focus in our life because they are our future and the most beautiful little creatures that I have ever seen and I was reading a press release from LifeLock from January called “Ident-A-Kid Has Selected LifeLock As Identity Theft Protection for over 3 Million Clients” You and I both know that children are our future and there is nothing more important.

From what I understand and see it’s not only you that needs protected, but your children and you have to proactively protect them from some con taking their identity away for years before you even realise what is going on. We are sick and tired of being victims and our children have to be protected. Don’t just turn your head and say that will never happen to me because it might already have happened.

People are always looking for jobs that they may be qualified for regardless if it’s in the beauty field or not and what could be more beautiful than protecting a life? Many people want to find a way to make money and there are so many opportunities. Lifelock is looking for new employees and you never know, both you and I might qualify. I know I’m always looking for new ways to bring extra money in.

There is so much diet information to be found everywhere we look, but we always repeat the same mistakes over and over. I have been guilty of the all or nothing diet through the years which means throwing everything out that tempts me and my intentions have always been good and I might stick with it for a few weeks then I start feeling deprived and have something that isn’t on my diet.

I then think what the heck, why bother then get back into my old routine and put the weight right back on, but after being a yo-yo dieter for many years I realized I didn’t have to deprive myself, I simply needed to learn to eat smaller portions of whatever I wanted. Then I didn’t have to feel guilty and throw in the towel.

Yo-yo dieters lose weight and then each time they add it back plus some and that’s no fun. I have often over the years tried to starve myself and there has to be a reconditioning of the way you think if your this type of dieter. You have to learn to take baby steps and take it slow and steady and change the way you think to keep that weight off permanently.

You don’t have to deprive your self of anything just smaller portions. I’m sure everyone has watched the diet programs on TV, The Biggest Loser and the celebrity fitness one so we all know by now that you have to set a realistic achievable goal like two pounds a week for several weeks and then maybe a pound a week after that.

Of course some weeks you’ll probably lose more and some you may even gain, but that doesn’t mean you need to give up. All programs suggest that you track your progress on a graph and that way you will see that ups and downs are natural and you can continue on toward your ideal weight goal, but taking it off fast isn’t the answer, the slower you lose it the longer it will stay off and that’s what we want.

Some women find that they gain weight around the menopause years and are advised to eat a healthy, low fat diet with plenty of fiber and avoid sugar. ( I love the cocktail hour so I have a problem with that one) and exercise regularly. As we get older usually the physical activity levels drop also. I have noticed that more so over the past 4 years and I simply can’t do what I use to.

There is no magic way to take off the pounds we manage to put on, but many people are using Alli or orlistat which is a fat blocker and it’s an over-the-counter drug, you can also get it in prescription form known as Xenical, but there are side effects which center around digestive and bowel problems and it should be used with a low fat diet plan under a doctors supervision.

The FDA does back it, but I’d check with my doctor before using it to make sure it would be right for you. He can explain all side effects and what to expect, but there has been some good results reported with this pill. You can read more about this product at their web site just do a search for Alli.